A Question for Jack from K.C.

Dear Jack,

I have a friend who lives with her mom and step-dad, just like me.  Sometimes she asks me what I do to get along with my step-dad, because she doesn’t get along with hers.  I think she’s afraid of him because he yells a lot.  I’ve heard him yell when I go over to visit her. I told my mom, but she says he’s may be worried about his job and yells when he gets upset.  Once, when we were playing dress up I saw a big black-and-blue bruise on her back.  She said she fell down, but I don’t think that’s how she got the bruise.  What can I do?  I feel like I’m tattling if I tell anyone.

From K.C.

Dear K.C.,

My mom tells me that some parents yell at their kids when they get upset or are really frustrated.  That doesn’t mean it’s OK, but they’re just not sure how to handle things better.  Sometimes they hit.  The parents need help to find better ways to control their behavior. My mom says to ask yourself this question before you tattle:  “Am I going to tattle because I want to help someone or because I want to hurt someone?”  Tell only if you are doing it to help someone.  You want to help your friend and her family.  The only way they can get help is for you to tell your parents or another grown-up that you trust.  It may not be easy, but it’s the right thing to do.

You can email me, if you need more help, at my mom’s email address:  TRichmond@cacjc.org.  Even grownups can ask questions!